Hey, starcoochie, wanna eat some cumquats and talk about space magic?

It’s been a long fucking time. And despite Krank’s multiple insistences on me updating this site, including threats, I have neglected you all, my waning, readers. But now I am here, ready to satiate your need for pointless articles talking shit about people that don’t know I exist. Now, I realize that my absence has lead to many of you quitting the interwebs altogether, and I don’t blame you, without my guidance, what could you possibly have done, otherwise? And I’m proud of you, because the internet is ruining you, and you aren’t even aware it’s happening. ARE YOU?!

Pure shit travels across the internet and into peoples’ brain meats so fast, they don’t even realize they’re being completely ruined. Do you think without the internet you’d really have some stupid obsession with multiples of the following:

1. zombie apocalypses
2. bacon
3. things being “epic” (almost always used in the wrong context)
4. using the word “fail” constantly, or the worst offender “epic fail”
5. blahlbhalbhalbh there’s too many…

Anyway, this needs to be put in check a bit. Who would you be without the internet raping your brain? DO YOU EVEN KNOW? Careful of how far into the matrix you slip and slide, because this is the kind of shit that happens when you’re finally face fucked by it:

Take these videos as a warning, people, because if you’re not careful, the internet is going to hump your leg so hard you’re going to wake up a morbidly obese juggalo with a sudden urge to sing showtunes on the internet while fucking a pillow that looks like sailor moon. Or maybe it’s just too late for you.

More to come…

oh and PS:
This site needs to be more give and take, tell me to draw you something in the comments and your wish shall be granted in an upcoming post. Also, some sort of audio addition should be added to this shitbox as well, don’t you think?

Which reminds me, mp3 of the moment has been updated, finger frickin’ lickin’ good. –>

6 Responses to Hey, starcoochie, wanna eat some cumquats and talk about space magic?

  1. Mugsy says:

    draw me a small home that exists in a world themed after Thanksgiving. include a landscape if needed. and make it erotic.

  2. Krank says:

    Draw me a octopus bodied koala bear eating bacon from the teets of a centaur, please. And make it erotic.

  3. Stein says:

    I…I honestly don’t know which one is the worst

    • Sarah says:

      the worst part is, I had to cut it down to these, otherwise the post would have just been a huge list of things that make your eyes bleed. D:

Comments are closed.