HEY, LISTEN!!! It’s a new Smeat section…

Hey guess what, jerks? Give up? Of course you do, losers. New Spookymeat section is coming and this is the first round. Every Tuesday from now until I break my promise, me and new writer, Joe (bio in the about section forthcoming), will be reviewing one terrible, disturbing foreign movie for your stupid pleasure. One paragraph, and one picture each. We’ll also link to a place to get the movie, in case you feel like being tortured (click the pic below). (we’ll think of a name for this section soon, like, as soon as my brain stops being explodey)

Joe:
I have no idea what the plot of this movie was. It made no sense and I didn’t read half the subtitles, because I was too disturbed watching a guy fuck a saddle of pork, puke covered manboobs jiggling and a chicken attack a penis. I thought the chicken had the right idea and I would be on his side should a war break out. I would recommend this movie only if you are disturbed, turned on by ugly men fucking wooden buildings or are one of those really sick fucks into Russian BBW porn. Some dude dies at the end and it makes you stare at his penis for an entire minute. I timed this… I wish the chicken had returned to peck the shit out of that one too.

Sarah:
This movie was about a lot of things, unforunately I’m not sure what any of those things were. But I know one thing, there were lots of cock. Cocks and meat fucking and some other stuff with a guy that sewed himself into his father’s dead carcass. Lucky for you, you get to see some contraption in which a guy chops his own stupid head off, because apparently, his art is his life, or death, or some crap. Also, people like to eat a lot in this movie, like, massive, horrifying amounts of disgusting crap that will make you swear off food for life, which is ironic, because you all know that Hungarians are starving, poor bastards that can’t afford rooms full of potatoes and chocolate bars. Cheers! *pukes*